We were talking about Shakespeare in English class and the tradition of throwing tomatoes when the actors are bad. Well it turns out, back then people thought tomatoes were poisonous, and so people would aim at the actors mouth and try to kILL THEM WHEN THEY WERE BAD AT ACTING OMG
when we were at the airport one time the guy at check-in reminded us that we weren’t allowed to carry sharp objects with us onto the plane and i said “oh damn looks like i’ll have to leave behind my wit” and thats how i made a middle-aged guy laugh so hard he had to get his colleague to take over his check-in desk
i just really hope all of you find someone who is really cool that you can love and have sex with and all that shit but you can also talk politics and about evolution. someone you don’t cling to at parties but you nonchalantly grab their ass when you walk by them in the crowd and someone you reach for at 2am in between dreams to cuddle.